I am an organizer.
I love organization, and therefore, I like rules. I like the structure they bring. I like how black + white they are.
Nice and neat.
Easy.
But, I also like to break rules. I really struggle with submitting to authority. I become defiant when someone tells me, suggests, or even asks me to do something.
Ridiculous.
I have a rebellious heart. Sometimes I am contrary just for the heck of it.
I hate this about myself. I wish it was easier for me to get along with others.
Why are the lines so blurred when it comes to relationships?
The Bible lays out some pretty simple rules when it comes to relationships with others.
Honor one another above yourself.
Pray for each other.
Take care of those in need.
Love others relentlessly.
Simple, right? Seems black + white enough.
But no. Somehow I have created 500 shades of gray and I try to justify each one. It's no longer clean cut, and I've made a big friggin' mess.
So what is this organizer to do with such an overwhelming + chaotic pile of mess?
Usually, when I am organizing a space, I start by throwing away anything that is junk. Next, clean out and prepare a storage space. Then, place items neatly into their proper space. Finally, sit back and enjoy the beauty of it all.
I love getting to be clever.
In the case of my messy heart, it's not really much different, except for the first step.
Step one is recognizing that I cannot possibly clean up the mess on my own. It's too big and I'm too prideful. Invite God to take over. Next, I repent of being obstinate and unloving (throwing away the junk). Then, ask the Lord to heal my heart and renew my mind (prepare a place). Then, at the end of it, the Lord turns my pig stye into something beautiful + totally unique.
Only an Artist could do that.
Only an Organizer could do that.
Only a Judge can right a wrong.
Only God can do that.

Obedience is better than sacrifice.
I am no longer a slave to sin. I am now a slave to righteousness and to obedience.
I still fall into sin. Every. Day.
But I am no slave to it!
I will obey and follow Jesus.
There will be rules broken, lessons learned, and sacrifice all along the way; but I will follow and I will obey.